I’m happy to feel solid ground under my feet again after the sailing accident last September.
– in the truest sense of the word. Because being confronted so directly with your own end leaves its mark.
Getting back into everyday life was the main task at the beginning. In the first few days at home, for example, I felt overwhelmed by our fully automatic coffee machine. We don’t really have a very complicated machine. Nevertheless, the simple filter coffee was initially easier on the nerves than a cafe crema, which I normally prefer to drink and which requires a lot of manual work.
My nerves were simply still a little frayed. Then one morning I looked at my cell phone – I always have upcoming appointments displayed on the home screen. And this time I could read it clearly:
“No life-threatening events today!”
At first I actually felt relieved, then I felt caught out in my tension – and had to smile. Because only now could I really decipher it: “No upcoming events today!”
My subconscious had played a little trick on me. It was probably a classic“Freudian slip“. The events were simply still very present. But the fact that I still have this cell phone in my hands is still amazing to me today. Because I saw it float away with my own eyes in September 2024. My bag was slowly bobbing along in the backwaters, already below the surface. When I discovered it, it was already three to four meters away from the boat. I thought about my keys, ID, credit cards, cell phone. Everything was gone! It didn’t matter. It would have been far too exhausting to swim after her. Only that was clear to me. There was no strength to waste. Just don’t lose your grip! That was all that mattered. Every disturbing thought that arose had to be pushed aside.
And right now I can see that I no longer feel cold when I think about the situation. However, I still find it amazing how incredibly quickly emotions can change in a very short space of time. Because as I was clinging to the sinking boat and my life, I felt a sober realization rise up at the sight of the disappearing belongings, which gave me some security for the moment:
How unimportant all papers and ID cards can be in life!
But when I received all my papers, keys and cards back that same evening in the emergency room, lying under the electric blanket, I felt a sense of relief that amazed me. No matter what! I was simply overjoyed to have all my documents back in my hands – even my cell phone was still working perfectly. Thanks to the attentive water police: they were able to pull my bag out of the water! Everything was soaking wet, but usable again after drying. Simply wonderful and great! I can’t thank all the helpers involved enough for their efforts!
My husband’s mileage book was also washed away along with our bags and rescued. The pages were stuck together, but almost everything was still legible. With the discolored cover, it now looks ancient and somewhat mysterious. No more tours will be recorded with me. That much I know for sure. My husband is still keeping his mind open as to whether he wants to sail again. I’m curious to see what he decides. The boat survived the capsize relatively unscathed. With a little effort, it will be possible to get it back into good shape.
And this realization came completely out of the blue when I was handed back my rucksack:
How important a key is, an ID card, a credit card, a cell phone!
It took a few more weeks until I no longer had sudden and inexplicable breathing difficulties, until my blood pressure had calmed down, until I could sleep through the night again, until I no longer felt nauseous at the sight of moving images with waves and water, until I had completely regained my physical strength.
Both my husband and I had initially underestimated the long-lasting exhaustion after the shock and severe hypothermia. We were very happy when we both slowly got a little fitter again – and then Corona arrived. That set us back again. We were both pretty restless until January. Trips? Crowds of people? We avoided them as much as possible.
In the meantime, we have both recovered well.
As I said: I have solid ground under my feet again!
The preparatory work for the exhibition in Arolsen was a helpful positive incentive
By February at the latest, I was able to really get back into the anticipation and concentrate better on the work. The experience of previous exhibitions was helpful in the planning, although of course every exhibition has to be adapted to the circumstances and spatial possibilities. But everything went smoothly and was great fun. The good cooperation with the museum team was once again a great source of inspiration and made my work much easier.
I think the walk-in cocoon with its simple look is also really well done.
However, the interior design challenged me to an extent that I hadn’t expected. The mosaic work for this is not exactly in my routine. This work made me realize that I am not yet able to work under normal pressure again. It was more difficult than usual for me to concentrate on the individual work steps – everything had to be measured very precisely, the material had to be processed appropriately and I had to keep an eye on the budget and the schedule. I installed the mosaic by hand on site. It was an experiment, so to speak, that had to be successful at the first attempt.
After completion, I was much more exhausted than I had expected. But I was also very happy and satisfied with the result.
The exhibition is a real success. You can still explore it until May 18
As we all know, every crisis brings opportunities!
We are probably all experiencing these very unsettling times with the unending global crises. All our personal challenges are being compounded by the daily irritating world news!
My drastic experiences at the end of 2024 gave me personally more clarity about my own goals and wishes. In order to get fit and resilient again, I had to focus a lot on myself despite all the external turbulence. I am very happy and grateful that I was able to do this together with my family.
I am certain that self-awareness comes before any change for the better!
And at least in my own environment, I now appreciate even more the opportunity to help shape my interaction with other people and my surroundings. How important it is to recognize your own responsibility, not to lose courage, to simply do what is feasible at the moment – I have experienced all of this myself as essential for survival.
I am now very happy and grateful that I can incorporate many of these thoughts and insights into my artistic work. With the current solo exhibition, I have been able to work out the themes that are close to my heart even more clearly. And one thing has become even clearer to me:
I will do more than just hang my work on the wall to show what I do.
Because there are so many surprising things to be gained from diving into the [UN]apparent worlds together during guided tours and activities. The conversations, questions and perspectives of the viewers bring new insights to light every time.
The hands-on activity with the children was once again a wonderful event with many beaming faces. The enthusiastic third-graders first discovered the many small figures and stories in the exhibition. Afterwards, they used the time intensively to create their own fantastic miniature creatures. The results were again very imaginative and rich in variety.
As I said, the exhibition is open until May 18. I hope to be able to report further information in good time.
Until then! – Stay healthy and confident .
